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Saturday, January 23, 2010

Should I Tell All My Business?

Well, I tell you some people really can talk. I mean tell all their business in less than 20 minutes. I truly wouldn't recommend doing that when dating online. It's very important to know who you are giving your personal information. You can't know the person til after you've talked for a while.

Most people lie in the first conversation. Sometimes its hard to tell is you're being lied to or not. But pay close attention. There are some important things you should tell the other person, just so they know what they are getting themselves into. Whether good or bad, you must let them be the judge of that.

What you think is horrible, might not be for the other person.

For example: Your age? How many children you have? Do you live in your own place? Do you have a job? Do you have a car? How's your credit? Are you close with your family?

These are questions I believe you should answer. Here's some you shouldn't answer.

For example: What's your address? What's your home phone number? Where do you work? What's your social security number?

Some of these questions seem obvious, but you will be amazed at some people that trust very easily. Everyone doesn't see the danger ahead.

Please understand anybody can say anything over the phone or internet. But time tell the truth. I know, I found out a lot of things that wasn't true my husband told me while we were talking online. Once we met and things started to unravel. But fortunate for me and him it was nothing major. I understood his reason for secrecy.

Somethings you have to kinda not lie, but don't put all your cards out on the table the first deal.

Remember you may not find mr. or mrs. perfect overnight, but it can happen.
Be Safe!
Lillian

Friday, January 22, 2010

Online Dating Sites

Now if I'm remembering correctly I started out on BlackPlanet.com. I had quite a few men say I'm beautiful, and ask for pornographic pictures of me, and all kinds of mess. There is the bad side of online dating. But I did'nt give up. I just blocked those type of men and kept going.

There was a couple of guys I really did like, but they was'nt willing to travel to meet me, and they were really far away. So we just basically talked but no relationship was obviously going to happen. But one of the guys still send me comments on Tagged.com another site. I still have it advertising my business. Also, I was a member of BlackSingles.com which is where I actually met my husband. He saw my picture and clicked it to look at my profile. nullnullnull

I was very honest in stating what type of person I wanted. Honesty I belive is what attracted my profile to him. We also had similar interests and birthdays on each others profile.

I know if I hadnt started my online adventure seeking a perfect mate for myself, I would not be happily married right now. It may seem sometimes hopeless and your family, friends, co-workers etc. may speak to you in a way to give you doubt. But, don't listen, just be save.

Don't let them know your address until you have fully checked them out. Meaning, this, with one guy he told me he worked at his apartment complex as the head of maintenance. I asked him for his address. Then I called the complex and asked to speak to him. I was told he was out working in the complex. So, therefore, he told me the truth. You have to take the time to verify everything.

Don't just take their word for it. Please be safe for yourself and if you have children like I do, be extra careful. Also, in the begining give them your Skype number or a prepaid cell phone number, if it is a weirdo, you can cut him loose easily and not receive harrassing phone calls.

I know this may seem like a lot. But your determination and safety will soon pay off. Remember your neighbor next door could be a killer or a pedifile so don't believe everyone online is that also. There's a lot of good men/women online and one of them is your future soul mate.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Beginers Mistakes

It's so easy to get caught up in the wrong subject conversation. You know if within the first 10 minutes or less if the word SEX is mentioned it's possibly a red flag. There's a lot of men and women out there wanting a mate online for the wrong reasons. Both sexes sometimes want someone to support them financially, or sexually whether online or offline. Usually it's not good to talk about sex until you've gotten to know the person better.

There's ways to find out if the person is being truthful. If you shy away from the sex conversation by changing the subject but the other person continues to push the issue, this could mean, MOVE ON!!! nullnullnull

Yes, it can be fun to have a sexual conversation with a good looking stranger, but not a potential life-long mate. Unless you both like that type of conversation, then in this case you wouldn't change subject or shy away from conversation.

Which reminds me, it is very important to know what your potential mate looks like. I used my webcam. My husband and I before we met chatted online using webcam. I was able to see exactly what he really looked like, not a picture. As a matter of fact his picture was 3 years old. He really didn't look much like that picture anymore. Fortunately for him, I still liked the way he looked. (ha.ha.)

So if possible ask for a current picture either by email, cell phone, or webcam. You have to open yourself up to show the other person what to expect when or if you ever meet.

Monday, January 18, 2010

What's your Standards?

One of the first things I did was mellow out my standards. I decided that the type of guys I had dated in the past, I wasn't going to date that type this time. Usually, I went for looks first. Yea, like most men have been doing for years.

But, I decided that it didn't matter if he was light-skinned or dark-skinned, as long as he loved me with all his heart, and believe me to be one of the most beautiful woman he has seen. And when I say loved me with all his heart that includes my children. It's impossible to love me but not them.

So take your time and determine how you want to approach meeting your true love. It's important to think about the type of mate you want first. And no matter what, stick to it. He/she is out there, just perfect for you.

Oh, if you're in a relationship and looking for true love. It may not happen. It's important to bring in less baggage as possible. Break-up, or Divorce your current mate first.

I was in a relationship when I first started looking for my true love, but I didn't find him til 3 months after I left the one I didn't want anymore. So, please whatever you do, don't start a relationship until you have finished your involvement with the current relationship.

Ask yourself these questions: Do I want my mate to be a drinker? a smoker? a Taurus? a Christian? Tall? Short? Hard worker? Be employed? Have loving family background? loves his/her mom? with/without children? Slender/Heavy?
There's many things to consider.





Remember you're looking for the person that's right for you and your lifestyle. You want someone that will fit in with your family. It is true you are marrying their family, and vise verse.
Make sure this person will be a good fit. These are all important factors and is good questions to ask once you meet a potential love interest.

Always Always Be Safe!!
Lillian

How I found TRUE LOVE Online!!!

You know some people say, "Its impossible"! Some say it's "Dangerous". Some people get frustrated with online dating because of females & males giving wrong information about themselves or posting pictures that are out of date. I truly understand. Some people are so desperate to find a "SOUL MATE", that they will do whatever it takes just to meet someone or get someone to like them. Therefore, on this blog I'm going to talk about how I found my TRUE LOVE online. I will give you information on different dating sites that helped me and the ones that didn't help me. I will give you some do's and donts about online dating. You will understand from a males point of view and a female point of view. This blog might get a little graphic. Because as you all know, when it comes to online dating, the word "Sex" is going to come up. But we will discuss that a little later.

There's a lot of information to cover, like which dating sites were helpful, how to approach a potential mate, when should you hold back information, and what information you should hold back, if at all. What do you do when your mate lives in another state, too far to commute. What's your standards? Are they too high, or too low? What signs to look for that shows you the person is truly interested in you or something else. How to watch for signs that this person could possibly put you in danger. I mean, there's a lot of things to cover, and I hope my success at finding true love online will benefit you.

Lillian

Monday, January 11, 2010

Friday, January 1, 2010

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